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Bog Standard

Restroom comedy has always been the reliable retreat for daily publications, and writers stay alert of notable bog-related stories and milestones, notably connected to soccer. Readers were entertained to learn that an online journalist a well-known presenter has a West Brom-themed urinal within his residence. Spare a thought about the Tykes follower who interpreted the restroom a little too literally, and needed rescuing from a deserted Oakwell post-napping in the lavatory midway through a 2015 losing match against Fleetwood Town. “He had no shoes on and misplaced his cellphone and his hat,” elaborated an official from the local fire department. And nobody can overlook when, at the height of his fame playing for City, Mario Balotelli visited a nearby college to access the restrooms in 2012. “He left his Bentley parked outside, before entering and requesting where the toilets were, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a student told a Manchester newspaper. “Later he simply strolled around the college grounds as if he owned it.”

The Restroom Quitting

Tuesday represents 25 years since Kevin Keegan stepped down as England manager following a short conversation inside a lavatory booth with FA director David Davies in the underground areas of Wembley, after the notorious 1-0 loss against Germany in 2000 – the Three Lions' last game at the historic stadium. As Davies remembers in his diary, FA Confidential, he entered the drenched troubled England locker room immediately after the match, discovering David Beckham crying and Tony Adams energized, the two stars urging for the official to reason with Keegan. Subsequent to Hamann's direct free-kick, Keegan had trudged down the tunnel with a distant gaze, and Davies found him slumped – just as he was at Anfield in 1996 – within the changing area's edge, whispering: “I’m off. I’m not for this.” Grabbing Keegan, Davies attempted urgently to rescue the scenario.

“What place could we identify for confidential discussion?” recalled Davies. “The tunnel? Crawling with television reporters. The dressing room? Heaving with emotional players. The bathing section? I couldn't conduct an important discussion with the national coach while athletes jumped in the pool. Only one option presented itself. The restroom stalls. A significant event in English football's extensive history occurred in the ancient loos of an arena marked for removal. The impending destruction could almost be smelled in the air. Pulling Kevin into a stall, I closed the door after us. We remained standing, looking at each other. ‘You cannot persuade me,’ Kevin stated. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I'll announce to journalists that I'm not competent. I cannot inspire the squad. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Aftermath

Therefore, Keegan stepped down, eventually revealing he viewed his tenure as national coach “empty”. The two-time European Footballer of the Year stated: “I found it hard to fill in the time. I ended up coaching the blind squad, the deaf squad, assisting the women's team. It's a tremendously tough role.” Football in England has advanced considerably over the past twenty-five years. For better or worse, those Wembley restrooms and those twin towers have long disappeared, although a German now works in the dugout where Keegan once perched. Thomas Tuchel’s side are among the favourites for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: England fans, don’t take this era for granted. This particular anniversary from one of the Three Lions’ darkest days acts as a memory that circumstances weren't consistently this positive.

Live Updates

Tune in with Luke McLaughlin at 8pm British Summer Time for Women's major tournament coverage regarding Arsenal versus Lyon.

Quote of the Day

“There we stood in a long row, in just our underwear. We were Europe’s best referees, elite athletes, role models, adults, parents, strong personalities with strong principles … however all remained silent. We scarcely made eye contact, our gazes flickered a bit nervously when we were requested to advance in couples. There Collina inspected us completely with an ice-cold gaze. Quiet and watchful” – previous global referee Jonas Eriksson reveals the humiliating procedures match officials were formerly exposed to by previous European football refereeing head Pierluigi Collina.

Football Daily Letters

“How important is a name? There’s a poem by Dr Seuss titled ‘Too Many Daves’. Have Blackpool suffered from Too Many Steves? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been removed from their positions. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not completely! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie continue to oversee the primary team. Complete Steve forward!” – John Myles.

“Since you've opened the budget and distributed some merchandise, I have decided to put finger to keypad and share a brief observation. Ange Postecoglou states that he picked fights on the school grounds with children he knew would beat him up. This pain-seeking behavior must justify his decision to join Nottingham Forest. As an enduring Tottenham follower I'll remain thankful for the second-year silverware yet the only follow-up season honor I predict him achieving near the Trent River, if he remains that duration, is the Championship and that would be some struggle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|